Scientist now believe that forgetting things is the key to remembering other things!

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Motorcycles are not meant to be stored in a garage during the winter. They’re meant to be ridden, no matter HOW cold it is!

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This is a little song I wrote based on the old Dixieland tune “St. James’ Infirmary.” Of course, I would NEVER leave my wife at an Exxon Station — Fina is much cheaper!

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I refuse to shop at the mall. So this year, I’m making my own Christmas presents.

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If I were to ever give a speech, I know this is exactly how it would be received. So don’t ask, and I won’t have to say, “Sorry, but I’m booked that night.”

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The computer has this way of sucking me into playing “Just one more round of solitaire” when I should be doing something more important — like watching TV.

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To save the environment, sometimes you have to give up those things you enjoy — but never bacon!

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Saturday is a day for work, but if you don’t have a plan, you might as well stay on the couch!

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Our economy would be better off if more people got haircuts.

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